It's Time We Allow Ourselves To Be...Ourselves

"If you talk back, you're going to get grounded."

"If you don't get good grades, you're not going to get into a good college."

"If you don't behave with 'class', you're not going to attract a decent partner."

Any of this sound familiar to you?

Many of us have been subliminally (and sometimes not-so-subliminally) taught ever since we were young that love was - essentially - conditional. It had to be earned.

This is why so many of us have developed:

Fear of making mistakes... AKA perfectionism.

Fear of disappointing others... AKA people-pleasing.

Fear of being abandoned... AKA anxious or avoidant attachment styles.

Fear of being authentic... AKA fear of being ourselves.

Again, I ask: Does any of this sound familiar to you?

If it does, you understand why I choose to do the work I do now:

To help those of us who have learned that we must earn affection that we are worthy of it as we are - no need to perform for others.

To rewrite narratives that no longer serve us or align with what we really want - no need to "should" on ourselves.

To help us give ourselves that unconditional love we know we deserve - no need to apologize for doing so.

We can mess up and still be respected + successful.

We can curse like sailors and still be classy + educated.

We can say "No" and still be kind + considerate.

It's time we allow ourselves to be... Ourselves.

We can start showing up more for our authentic selves little by little when we:

Separate the beliefs we can identify as our own from the ones we've subconsciously adopted from others.

Set up boundaries - with ourselves and those around us - to uphold respect in our relationships.

Take accountability for our actions - whether we take pride in them or we want to make changes to them.

Follow through with promises we make to ourselves to create a sense of safety and security on our own...

So let's do it! Let's start showing up and being unapologetically us!